The Plot: Jillian (hot chick of Still Waiting fame) & Sarah (I don’t know who she is at all) are a mismatched pair of teenage girls in a small
town off the coast of East Bumblephukke, Indiana on the planet ThisMovieSuxAnus located in the universe BeeelowMe. Goth girls and the like full of teen angst have gone missing over the years (they will not be missed) and when Sarah’s shallow friend Jillian becomes one of the unfortunate cybersex victims, she teams 
up with an unsuspecting Google geek named Jasper (I had a dog named Jasper, he had more personality) and uses him to find her friend and the others. The movie is filmed to give you the impression that something of supernatural origin is the antagonist, (with Tool music video effects and lighting that will send epileptic’s everywhere into a fit), but the reality is far more lackluster.
The music was used few and far between, it relied solely on the
dialogue and acting to set the mood. When it was played it was softly dark and ominous, the stuff of a Saturday afternoon ‘USA Network ‘movie.
The cinematography was okay for the genre and met my expectations for a movie of this caliber. (And that ain’t sayin’ much.)
The acting didn’t seem to be a stretch for the cast, they probably have been in character all their teen years, and it wouldn’t surprise 
me. At the very least they have gone to school with the types portrayed and it is very easy for them to mimic. I found it painful to watch because I have a 15 year old who tries her damndest to be something that she’s not, so it’s all too familiar.
The effects were a sham because, again, this movie had nothing to do with how it was portrayed. There was no evil cult of Satan worshippers, no rip in the gateway between Hell and Earth, etc., So congratulations cameraman for finding the Evil Dead macro button 
on the underbelly of the camera, but it wasn’t needed for this movie.
Overall: this movie was not even worthy of the Blu Ray format. So I got to see a piss poor plot and Pine Bush High acting in high definition. Big frickin whoop. In the immortal words of Gorilla Monsoon, “Gimme a break, Brain.”
1 out of 5 “Hiya Georgie’s”
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